I was home before midnight last night. I haven't been at home by midnight on New Year's Eve in over ten years, but last night, for me, it was the place to be.
It is the reason that I can sit and type on my computer without hating the computer. Early night with very little alcohol means no hangover. Which means I started 2013 with a clear head (and I wasn't bartending all night!). It's strange to be awake at 7:30 in the morning on January 1st. Even the traffic is still dozing. My husband is snuggled, asleep at my side, and Smudge-cat sits on my foot. It truly is the calm before the storm.
Today is the day I will give up my residence in Salem, Oregon. Tomorrow we will leave for Los Angeles in search of new adventures. I am both anxious and excited for this move. I am looking forward to meeting new friends, and honestly terrified that I won't be "cool" enough for L.A.. Justin says that I am awesome, and there are people there who are awaiting my arrival and looking forward to meeting me, but there is a scared, insecure voice in my head that keeps saying, "Stay where you know you're loved".
Oddly enough, it's knowing that I am loved here that makes me strong enough to leave. That might not make sense to you, but for me, just knowing that I have people anywhere in the world who wish me nothing but love, affection, and goodwill gives me hope that I can find similar people in the greater Los Angeles area. And if I don't, I can use social media to contact my beloved friends and gain support.
Enough! It's New Year's Day! It's time for me to make some resolutions, right?
1. I resolve to love myself more. This means treating myself better in all ways. Better food in my body, more exercise, more sex (watch out, Justin!), and accepting everything about me as part of what makes me unique and special.
2. I resolve to dance more and worry less. I dance a lot, but I worry even more. So, I am going to dance two minutes for every one minute I spend worrying. (That may not sound like a lot to you, but I worry more that your average individual, so it will add up quickly.) I am not sure how it's going to work, but my idea is that if I spend time consciously doing something I love, to counter doing something I do unconsciously, I'll both become more aware of what triggers my worrying, and get to spend more time doing something I love. Win-win.
3. I resolve to create more and consume less. I am tired of being merely a consumer. It's mindless. I like to use my brain. Being creative means using my brain. WIN!
4. I resolve to revisit this list and reassess and adjust it over the next twelve months.
To all of you: May your 2013 be the best thus far. May you find laughter, light, and love!
